Saturday 3 August 2013

Vabereki pamusha wemwana

Pane nyaya dzakawanda dzevabereki dzinovaka kana kuputsa musha wemwana. Ngatisafunga kuti mubereki wese anofarira mwana wake kuva nomuchato wakasimba. Kune vamwe vasingazvifariri, vanoita zvinhu zvinoputsa musha wemwana wavo vachiziva kuti ndizvo zvavari kuita. Ngatitangire pakubvumirana kuti iwe kana waroorana noumwe munhu, chinangwa chenyu chiri pakuvaka musha wenyu nokuzoita vana venyu vamunoda kurera mese pamwe chete. Muchava vanhu vanomufaro chose kana machembera vana venyu vese vari vapenyu uye vabva pamusha penyu vachienda kunovakawo misha yavo.
Asi kazhinji tinoona zvisirizvo. Tinoona zviito zvevabereki zvichikanganisa upenyu hwevana vavo. Ndiyo nyaya yatinoda pano kumbotaura nezvimwe zvezvinoputsa misha yevana zvinoitwa nevabereki.

Kuhura kwamai vemukadzi
Kana uri mukadzi akawanikwa pamurume anokuda chose chose, mai vako ndokuzikamwa kuti munhu anoita zvechihure, zvinonetsa kuti murume wako asafunga kuti iwewo unokwanisa kuva unohura kana kuti uchazoda kuhurawo imwe nguva. Kufunga kwakadai kunobva pakuziva kuti munhu wese anoita zvaakakura achiona munhuri yake. Kana vabereki vaiva vanhu vanohura zvinonetsa kuti iwe ugoreriwa navo ugosafunga kuti kuhura chinhu chakanaka. Saka apa murume achikuongorora anotambudzika moyo nenyaya yokuti mai vako vanohura.

Kumwe kuhurawo kunoonekwa kuti maitire acho anoda sabhuku chaiye. Sezvatakamboona mu BIRMINGHAM umu mai vemukadzi vavhakasha kubva kuZimbabwe, ndokuita mwedzi mitatu vachigara nemwana wavo nomurume wake vachirera mwana wemwana. Kuzoti vajaira kugarapo ndokufunga zvevarume, vopota vachiti mwana nomurume vari kumabasa ivo vosara vachipinza murume mumba ivo murume wavo ari kuZimbabwe. PaWeekend vondovata kumba kwechikomba chiya.
Iyi haisi nyaya inokwanisa kungohi ndeya mai ava chete inokoka hama dzese dzinokwanisa kuudzwa yoonekwa kuti mwana wavo muchato wake wava nemabhikozi akawanda nokuti murume haachina shuwa kuti mukadzi wake anozvitora sei. Mai vemukadzi vanohura hachisi chinhu chokuiginowa zviri nyore chero uchida mukadzi wacho.

Mai vemurume vanohura
Kana ukakura uchiziva kuti mai vako vanohura, uchiona zviito zvavo zvokuhura, ukazoroorawo mukadzi wako, mufungwa mako vakadzi vese vanohura, saka zvinonetsa kuvimba mukadzi wako. Unobva wangoitawo zvaichiita baba vako pavaziva zvikomba zvamai vako. Hasha, kupopota, kufungira, etc. Unoona munhu achingoda kugarotarisa foni yemukadzi wake kuti aone kuti hapana zvikomba zvambomufonera here. Foni ikarira mukadzi akadavira, zheve dzemurume dzomira kuti ahwe kuti ndiyani ari kutaura nomukadzi wake. Pavanopedza kutaura unohwa obvunza kuti “Ndiani akufonera?” Anoda kuziva kuti munhu afona haasi chikomba.

Adaro otarisazve EMAIL yomukadzi pachivande, kuti azive zviri kuitwa nomukadzi wake zvese.
Kare kuita vamwene vanohura zvaisvodesa asi mazuvano unotoona muroora navamwene vese vakapfeka zvikabudura zvinoshinya, magaro akasungwa zvinoridzisa varume muridzo.  Asi muroora anozoti ava mumba make nomurume wake ofungigwa zvakawanda.

Kuhura kwababa vemurume/mukadzi
Vanababa kubva kare vaingohura asi tichitarisa tinoona kuti vanakomana vakawanda vanokopera zviito zvamadzibaba avo kureva kuti mwana ana baba vaanoziva kuti vanohura achadawo kuhura. Mwanasikana ana baba vanohura achava munhu anoti murume wake akahura anozvigamuchira sokugamuchira kwaiita mai vake pakuhura kwababa vake. Pamafungire ake, varume vanhu vanohura.

Pane Zvimwe.
Mafungire awa ndiwo amwe chetezve panyaya dzakaita sevabereki vanoba, vanogaropopotedzana, vanogarorovana mumba, vanonyanyoda mari kupfuura vana vavo. Ukakurira mumhuri yakadai, ukasazviongorora zvakanaka unongotevedzerawo izvozvo wakura.

Kutonga nyaya dzemumba yemwana.
Mwana wako kana aroora/aroogwa hazvirevi kuti ava munhu akachenjera pazvinhu zvese. Iwe pawanga uri zera rake, wanga uchitodzidzawo pazvinhu zvemumba. Pane zvakawanda zvaasingazivi zvaanoda kuraigwa pazviri. Mazuvano vanhu vechidiki vajaira kuti akada chinhu anochiwana. Zvino kana ava mumba akati anoda kuitigwa ichi kana icho, uya waanoudza asingazivivo kuti chinoitwa sei, panopopotedzanwa, iwe mubereki woerekana mwana asvika pamba pako asiya murume/mukadzi kwahi handichamudi. Kuti ubate pene musoro wenyaya zvoramba.

Unohwa mai voudza shamwari yavo mwana uya atiza murume aripo kuti “Taifunga kuti murume kwaye izvo ibenzi remunhu. Haana zvaanoziva. Dai Eresina asina kutiza mumba dai akatofa izvozvi. Ngaachitogara zvake pano. Zvokuwanikwa zvaramba.” Iyawo shamwari iri kuudzwa yotogara pasi kuti tii ibikwa nyaya dziwande. Vese vakangamwa kuti ivo vaimbotukanawo nevarume vavo. Hapana anofunga kuti acharera zvivana zviviri izvi zvauiwa nazvo ndiani.

Vanhu dzidzai kudzikamisa hana dzehama dzenyu dzakaroorana kuti vanhu vayanane pane kukuchidzira kupopotedzana kuya. Kutiza murume/mukadzi uchinopotera kuvabereki vako hazvirevi kuti wada kurambana naye. Zvinoreva kuti pane chimwe chausina SKILL yokuchibata nayo saka watiza. Mubereki ngaabvunzurudze ahwe pane nyaya agokupa SKILL yacho yokugadziridza nyaya hana yakadzikama. Kana ukadzikera ukanogadzirisa unenge wawedzera kukura. Pazvinozoitikazve, pane kutiza unotaura nomubereki pafoni wopiwa SUPPORT yauri kuda.


Kana mwana nomurume wake vapokana, iwe mubereki hwisisa kuti vana hava EXPERIENCE yokugara vese saka vanoda kudzidziswa magarire uye kuti musha unovakwa sei. Kuvaka musha haisi nyore saka ukatovabatsira pachinhu chimwe chete watogona. 

Vabereki panyaya dzerhoji
Koti kana mwana ane nyaya dzokuvatana dziri kumunetsa zvikuru vabereki vanongoudza mwana zvikuru manasikana kuti ngaaende anovata nomurume. Havabvunzi DETAIL yokuti chii chiri kunetsa pakuvatana kwavo kana kuti zvakatanga riini. Havakasirizve kutaura kuti vana ngavaende kuchipatara vanoonekwa. Kuvanhu vakuru vanongova neruzivo gwekuti murume nomukadzi vanopinzana chombo vosiirana urume nyaya yatopera.

Kuzoda kutaura kuti bodo murume anondibata chibharo kana kuti anondikasirira hapana anozvihwisisa saka mhosva haitongwi zvine musoro wenyaya. Vana nevabereki vavo parudzi gwedu havataurirani nyaya dzerhoji vachihwisisana. Kare zvainzi enda kwatete unodzidziswa, mukomanawo ohi enda kwababamunini undodzidziswa. Mazuvano, nenyaya dzokuti vanhu vemhuru vanogara vakatarangana uye vanhu vakawanda vakafa, unokwanisa kungosara une vabereki chete.

Mubereki anoremegwa nokutaurira mwana wake nyaya yeRhoji. Kuti mai vaudze mwana wavo kuti asangoda zvokuvata manhede chete asi ambofongorawo nokuti zvinonaka zvakasiyana, vanoona sokuti mwana anozofunga kuti ndiwo maitire avo nababa. Saka nyaya yese inozotaugwa nechibhende zvokuti mwana hapana chaanohwisisa.

Ndakambova panyaya yeimwe hama yedu yanga yave nenguva isina mimba. Paakanotogwa ndokuuyiwa naye kumusha, tete vakangomubvunza mubvunzo umwe chete. "Uri kuvata nomurume zvakanaka here?"  Iye ndokungoti "Hongu." Zvikabva zvatopera. Hameno kuti chavakahwisisana ipapo chii. Ndakatozoti ndava naye musikana ndokumubvunzurudza kuti chaange achiti HUNGU chii, uye anoziva sei kuti ari kuvata nomurume zvakanaka. Ndipo pakazobuda mashoko akawanda.

Kana wada kubvunza nyaya idzi kumwana wako akawanikwa, asi uchisvoda kubvunza, nyora mibvunzo yako pasi ugoita yokuverenga, kana kunopa tete vobvunza mwana. Ukuwo kana uchida ruzivo kubva kumubereki nyora mibvunzo yako ugovatumira vagonyora mhinduro vagodzosa. Pakubvunza mai vanogona chirungu vhenganisa chirungiu nechiKaranga kuti zvisanyanya kusvodesa.

Vabereki nevaroora/vakuwasha
Pane nyaya dzinotukanisa vanhu pamusha dzinobva kuvabereki vemukadzi kana vemurume. Zvikuru kana mai vemurume vagara vatovenga muroora wavo. Unohwa mashoko obuda kuti:
Haagoni kubika
Haaisiri murume mvura yokugeza
Haagoni kuaina
Mai vake vanohi vanoroya
Iye moroora akurisa
Imvana
Takahwa kuti anohura
Akapiwa mari na Tomasi.
Madhirezi ake mapfupi.


Zvaunoudzwa zvakawanda. Umwe wandinoziva aingonzwa vamwene vachiudza shamwari dzavo kuti mwana wavo akaroora mukadzi akashata zvokuti, iye ipapo ari pazhe achisuka ndiro, vamwene neshamwari yvo voridza chikwee mumba. Havasi kuziva kuti ari kuhwa zvavanotaura.

Vvamwene vanokwanisa kuisa ruvengo pakati pake nomwana wavo. Vabereki, zvikuru mai vemurume, vanhu vane simba rokupokanisa. Ini ndogara ndichiudza varoora vatsva kuti kana wasvikako ona kuti washamwaridzana namai vemurume wako nokuti ndivo vano key yomoyo wemwana wavo. Mwana anoda kugaroudzwa kuti akagona pakusarudza mukadzi. Kana mai vake vakatanga kumuudza kuti mukadzi wake ane matambudziko okuti neekuti, anoona sokuti mukadzi waanaye haasiri iye aanofanira kuva naye.

Mwana, zvikuru mukomana, anofanira kusapotwa pasarudzo yake yomukadzi. Kana uri mubereki, une nyaya nomuroora, muudze muri vaviri kuti chii chaunoda kumutsiura. Muroorawo kana vamwene vakutsiura, REACTION yako unovataridza kuti uri munhu akaita sei. Ukataridza kutenda nedzidziso yavo, vanokuudzawo zvimwe zvakawanda somwana wavo. Ukavapindura zvine hasha kana kuti zvinotaridza kuti havana kudzidza sewe, watozvipinza pakaoma. Hwisisa kuti mwana wavo anoda mai vake kukupfuura uye iwe uri mutogwa pamusha apa. Akutsiura ndiye hama yako.

Kana uri mwanasikana vabereki vasingafariri murume wako, unokwanisa kungogara kure navo nokuti unoenda kumurume wako.

Wedzerai vanowedzera.

Udzai vamwe!!!!!!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Mai Chibwe. Use the actual words such as mb**O, b***e etc. These words such as chitubu that you use are just out of context> unless if you are writing for ana mbuya nanasekuru.

Mai E Chibwe said...

Pano hapana zvokusarudza vaverengi zvichibva pazera romunhu saka munhu wese anoda kuverenga anoverenga. PaChikaranga pane mashoko asingataugwi kuvana vadiki asi vanenge vachiziva kuti chii chiri kutaugwa.

Iro vara rawataura rokuti B***E ivara rechibhende futi. inhu yauri kureva inohi MH***E. Saka iwe washandisireiwo chibhende?

Ndinyorere kukero inoti maichibwe@yahoo.co.uk titaure nyaya iyi.

shepherd said...

Hapana chakaipa pama words echibhende anoshandiswa pano. Ndooatajaira. Chaiwo chaiwo anotiremera.

Anonymous said...

Hongu zviri right kushandisa chibhende pano asi ndinoona sokuti mai Chibwe munobatsira zvikuru munyaya dzakasiyana siyana dzinowanikwa mumagariro edu. Munobatsira zvakanyanya panyaya dzokuvatana idzi saka mukashandisa manzwi chaiwo-iwo anobatsira stereki kuwedzera zemo kumuverengi zvekuti anobva atofunga kurara nemurume/mukadzi wake ipao ipapo, saka neimwe nyaya munenge matobatsira zvikuru kunevaya vanotora nguva kuti zemo rikwire. Then kune vasina kuroora/kuroorwa, vanenge vachitodzodzawo. Mune imwe nyaya, language yemubedroom kana vaviri vachida kurara vese should be straight.Izvi zvinoita kuti kurara mese kuve nyore uye muchifara. Saka neni ndinoti mai chibwe taurai manzwi chaiwo-iwo. Thanx

Anonymous said...

Vanhu tendai chinhu chamaitirwa chakanaka. Apa uri kuda kuti Mai Chibwe vapedze imwe nguva paEditing all her articles? Why? Tiri kuvabhadhara here? If you are doing a seminar, would you use the right Shona Words? I dare you appear on radio or TV in Zim and utter those words here in Zim. Unosungwa program yako isati yapera. Tatojaira maWords avo awa saka chitoregai zvakadaro. Chibhende ndicho Mai Chibwe. Ngatiendere mberi nenyaya. Ini ndadzidza zvakawanda pano.
Doing a very good Job. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Amai chibwe, nyaya yamataura yekuti varume kare vanongozivikanwa kuti vai hura. Mubvunzo wangu unoti. Ava varume vaihura sezvamatura vaihura naniko? Nembwa here? kana vaihura nevanhukadzi kureva kuti chaingoveko kare nanhasi chiriko,

Mai E Chibwe said...

Kubva kare nakare mvana dzemuraini dzaingotyiwa nevana mai vedzimba. Varume vaviri kana vatatu muraini vaihura nemvana idzi. Kwakazouyawo vapambi venyika vatiudza kuti ngakuvakwe madhorobha asi dzimba dzomuchato dzange dzisiko chihure ndokubva mumvana dzomuraini ndokuenda kudhorobha kwaigara mahure ainovata nevarume vari kumabasa vakadzi vavo vari mumusha.

Zvadaro kwakaita dzimba dzomuchato nemahure anohurira mari saka vaiziva kuvata nomurume nomazvo kuti arambe achidzoka.

Mazuvano kune mahure anohi smoro house anohura nevarume vanobhadhara rent, magetsi, school fees yevana, uye muhure asingashandi asi ane varume kana vashanu vanomupa mari vachimuchinjana vachifunga kuti vana vake ndevavo.

History yechihure iriko kunyika dzese. Varume vandiri kutaura vanhu vane mhuri kwete varumwewo zvavo vasingagoni kunyenga.