Thursday, 10 April 2014

Murume/Mukadzi ahura iwe woramba unaye

Ngationgorore nyaya iyi yokuti muri vaviri mumba, poita wechitatu, iwe wogarapo, kana uri muadzi kana uri murume, fungwa yako inenge ichiti kudii pazviri. Une rudo nomunhu asingakudi here kana kuti uri munhu asina njere. Ngatitarisei nyaya dzakadai kuti dzinoitiswa nei pamusha.

Kuhura kwemurume:
Murume wepamba munhu ane musengwa wemusha pazvinhu zvakawanda chose zvinoti mari youkuriritira mhuri uye kuronga upenyu hwevana uye kuti hama dzenyu dziya dzinongoerekana dzasvika dzafidhiwauye kupiwa mari yebhazi. Kana murume wemusha akasahwisisa mutoro wake pamusha wake musha haumiri zvakanaka.

Kuhura kwemurume kune zvikonzero zvatinohwa zvakawanda zvokuti ukagara pasi nomurume wako ukamubvunza kuti chii chingaitisa samusha kuti ahure, unohwa achikuudza zvaanofungira kuti ndizvo asi maudzire aanokuita ndeekukuyambira kuti uzive zvingamuhurisa iye. Vakawanda vanoda kuti iwe mukadzi uhwisise kuti ukamurambira mumba anonotsvaka kumwe asi asina rudo nouya waatsvaka. Varume vanhu vanokwanisa kungoda umwe munhu wekuvata naye asi rudo pasina. Uya wavatwa naye kazhinji haadi kungobvumawo pasina chaanowana pazviri. Munhukadzi anofarira kuhura nomurume akaroora anozviona ari munhu akanaka kupfuura mukadzi wemurume uya. Ukuwo anoda kugaropiwa mari pakuvatwa naye kwake kureva kuti ihure risingadi kuhi ihure. Mari iya yaanopiwa anopiwa zviri zvimwe zvinhu.

Ukatarisa magarire amaSimoro hausi unoona kuti mari yavanopiwa inouya yakatonanga chimwe chinhu kuitira kuti asafunga kuti zvaari kuita kuhura. Anopiwa mari ohi ndeyekubhadhara magetsi, mvura, kana rhendi. Haaudzwi kuti iyi imari yekukurhoja kwandakaita madeko sezvinoitwa hure rePROFESSIONAL. Asi pese ipapa murume anenge achitoziva kuti chii chaari kupira munhu mari uye kuti pane vamwe varumewo vari kumupa mari yechihure chake navo.

Ukatarisazve varume vanoshanda vanohura unoona kuti vakawanda havadi kubvuma kuti ndivo vane dambudziko. Unohwa murume mukuru achibheja kuti musikana waanoshanda naye ndiye anomukwezva kuti ahure naye. Iye oda kuti isu vatereri venyaya yake tibvume kuti iye haana mhosva. Musikana uya ndiye ane mhosva. Kwahi ingari yokuti tinoshanda tese muhofisi saka hapana zvandingaita.

Wotarisazve varume vonokwikwidzana kuvata nemvana yomuraini. Havadi kuti tizive kuti ndivo vane mhosva. Kwahi mvana ndiyo yanditi uya umwe tii ndokubva ndapinda mumba mayo ndokuzohi uya ukwire.

Koitazve varume zvanokuudza kuti vakhura nokuda kwekuti mukadzi wake ange asipo ari kumusha iye ndokushaya wekutamba naye. Kwahi ndakangomukumbirawo kuti azobika musi iwoyo chete iye ndokubika, ndokudya ndokutanga kuona TV pane kudzokera kumba kwake. Takazopedza kuona TV mabhazi kusisina ndikati chirega uzoenda mangwana. Kuhi ndiye akakoka muhure bodo haadi.

Ukatarisazve murume anoroora mukadzi wechipiri pachivande iwe mukadzi wake wongozoerekana pamba pako pasvika umwe mukadzi anoti aroogwa nomurume wako, unoona kuti iye murume haadi kubvuma kuti ane mhosva. Umwe watakanoona panyaya yakadai aitotibvunza kuti tinofunga kuti aikwanisa kuita sei musikana wake aita mimba, sokuti mimba yacho musikana akangoerekana atoita pasina zvaitwa kuti aite mimba yacho. Mimba inoitiswa nokupiwa urume saka iwe murume ukavata nomukadzi wemusango usina kupfeka kondhomu zvinoreva kuti uri kuda kumupa urume, saka achatoita mimba.

Panyaya dzese idzi tinoona kuti murume wako rudo newe haana. Munhu anokuonawo semuranda wake anogarira kuchengeta musha asi pasina chake pamusha apa. Mubvunzo wedu pano ndewekuti iwe kana wahwisisa zvaitwa nomurume wako, uye kuti hazvigadziriki chii chaunogarira pakadai? Ndiwo mubvunzo watichazama kupindura. Ngatimbotarisawo kuhura kwemukadzi.


Kuhura kwemukadzi

Mai vemba munhuwo ane basa rakawanda pazvinhu zvakawanda. Mazuvano mukadzi anofanirawo kunge achishanda kuti mese muise mari pamwe chete muriritire mhuri yenyu. Vana mai vemba kuhura kwavo kwakati siyanei nokuhura kwavarume. Kana mukadzi afunga kuhura kazhinji anohura akaviga chihure chake zvokuti murume wake haatombozivi kuti ari kuhura. Kunozotiwo uya murume waari kuhura naye ndiye anoudza shamwari dzake zvobuda pachena. Pamwe chikomba chiya chinoitira mukadzi uyu zvachinosiitira mamwe mahure, kumutengera zvinhu, iye obva aenda nazvo kumba. Pakadai nyaya yozobuda.

Vakadzi kuhura kwavo kazhinji ndekwekutsvaka rudo kana kumba kusina rudo. Vakadzi vakawabda vane LOYALTY kuvarume vavo asi rudo haguna shasha. Kana mukadzi akasapiwa rudo zvinonetsa kusahura. Pakuhura kwacho murume wake akazotanga kumupa rudo kuhura kunoderera. Ndiwo masikigwe evakadzi uye ndiyo siyano yavo nevarume. Hatisi kuti hakuna mukadzi wemumba anongotanga kuhura zvichibva paruchiva, asi tiri kuti vakawanda havazviiti.

Hino toti mukadzi wako ahura, uye iwe murume wazvibata kuti ahura, chiichinoitisa kuti ude kugara naye? Ndiwo mubvunzo wedu pano?

Mubvunzo wedu kuvarume nevakadzi
Toda kumbohwawo kubva kune vakambozviitigwa. Kuti umwe wako ahura, iwe wazviziva, pamwe atouya noumwe mukadzi pamusha wako, iwe wozvigamuchira kusvika pakuti muupenyu hwenyu murume wenyu anoti nhasi avata nouyu, mangwana ovata nouyu. iwe uchitomuvhurira makumbo uchiziva kuti madeko ange ari pakati pemakumbo amainini.  Unenge uri munhu akjaita sei mufungwa dzako?

Ukuwo toti mukadzi wako aimbohura nanhingi waunoziva. Iwe unoziva kuchemerera kunoita mukadzi wako pakuvatana kwenyu, unoziva kuti ndizvo zvaaiita nechikomba chake, uye aiuya kumba ambopiwa urume hechikomba ichi, asi iwe haunei nazvo zvese izvi unogamuchira mukadzi wako kana ati anoda kudzoka. Unenge uri munhu akaita sei mufungwa dzako?

Tichiongorora tinoona kuti vashomanana vanohurigwa vagoshaya hanya nazvo. Vanowanzoshaya hanya vanhu vasina njere, vakaita sevakadzi vemaPositori vaya nanongoungana pamurume umwe chete vasingahwisisi kuti murume uyu ihure. Kana munhu ane njere kazhinji anogumbuka nokuhurigwa nomurume/mukadzi wake zvokuti kuti azokwanisa kugara, pane chimwe chinhu chinomuita agare chaanoremekedza kupfuura kuipa kwekuhurigwa.  Zvimwe zvezvinhu izvi ndeizvi.

Kugarira muchato
Kune vamwe, zvikuru vanhukadzi vanoremekedza muchato zvokuti chero murume akaita chihure zvakadii, mukadzi anogarapo chete nokuda kwekuti akabvuma kuchata nomurume uyu. Kuhi MRS choita chinhu chikuru. Kubvuma kuti muchato wapera zvinogozha chose. Ukatarisa mumaraini unoona vakadzi vakawanda vanohurigwa uku vachimborohwa nokutukwa nokuitigwa zvinhu zvisiri pamurairo asi havasiyi varume vavo chero zvodii. Pamwe anombotsamwa oinda kumusha kwake asi hapaiti nguva asina kufunga murume wake, obva adzoka.

Varumewo unoona murume anonyatsoziva kuti mukadzi wake ari kuhura. Vanhu vemuraini vachitoudzana kuti akadyiswa, asi iye haanei nazvo anongoda mukadzi wake. Zvinomuremera kugura muchato. Vamwewo varume unoona kuti kana ambopopota akadzinga mukadzi, kunopera vhiki obva atevera ondokumbira kuti mukadzi adzoke. Adzoka anoramba achingohura murume achingonetseka nazvo asi kwasviba anovata naye uye anogara naye.

Pane umwe hama yedu ane mukadzi akabva pamba vatukana, akanogara mwedzi yakati kuti murume ndokutevera ndokuwana mukadzi ane mimba ndokunodzoka naye. Izvozvi vane vana vatatu asi mukadzi anoudza murume kuti HAUZVARI uye vana ava havasi vake, asi vese vanongodanana vachigara vese.


Kugarira vana
Koitazve vame varume nevakadzi vanoti vanogarira vana vavo kuti vakure vane vabereki vavo vese. Ukataura nevanhu vane fungwa dzakadai unohwisisa kuti munhu asi rudo zvachose nomunhu waanogara naye asi aona kuti upenyu hwevana vake hwakakosha zvokuti zviri nani azvirerere vana vake muridzi pane kuti asiye murume/mukadzi vana vozotsvakigwa umwe mubereki. Nyaya yevana iyi inonetsa kuhwisisa kana usina vana.

Ini kazhinji ndikabvunzwa kuti nyaya yokuroorana yakamira sei ndinoudza musikana kuti kana usingashandi usafunga zvokuwanikwa. Mazuvano kana usina mari yako wega iwe kana kuti usina kudzidza usazviwedzera nhamo nokuda kuwanikwa nokuti varume inhunzvatunzva. Akapa musikana akanaka LIFT anotomboda kuvata naye iwe uri kumba kwacho kwaari kuuya, ipapo iwe hauna kuguta zvinhu.

Nyaya yokugarira vana inyaya hayo asi kana waida chirega kuti vana vazive kuti haudanani namai/baba vavo. Wangogarira vana chete. Vana vanokuona uchindovata nouya mubereki wausingadi vobva vakura vachifunga kuti kuvata nomunhu wausingadi zvinokwanisika. Zvadaro hapana STABILITY yawapa vana. Kana usingadi murume/mukadzi, chingoita sokuti unomuda kana vana varipo.

Kugarira ufumi hwako
Kune vamwezve vanoti Ndakaroorana nomunhu uyu asina fuma yese yava pano iyi saka ndeyangu uye pano handibvi. Munhu otogarapo asi pava noumwe mukadzi mutsva. Pane umwe akaendesa murume kuchikoro achishanda sedhongi vachizama kugadzira musha wavo. Murume ndokupedza kudzidza ndokuwana basa riri pamusoro, pedzezvo ndokumitisa umwe musikana. Uya mukadzi sare vavava haachin chake. Obva ati pano handibvi nokuti kudzidza kwake murume uyu ndini. Asizve chaunogarirapo chaicho chii? Kana INVESTMENT yako yaparara chitoro chako chisina zvinotengeswa, ukagaramo mudangwaza iroro chii chauchawanapo?

Kusava nezvaunogona kuita wega

Koitazve vamwe vanoongorora nyaya yavo vohwisisa kuti akasiyana nenhubu iyi haawani upenyu hwakanaka nokuti iye haashandi uye haana mukana wekushandawo chiwana mari, Vekumhuri yake Havana chavangamubatsira nacho. Pakadai panonetsa nokuti munhu anoperegwa nezvaangaita pakukanganisa kweumwe wake. 


UDZAI VAMWE!!!!!!
Toda kuhwisisa kuti vanhu vakadai vanoitiswa kudai nei?  VaNOKWANISA KUTIJEKESERA JEKESERAI TIHWE.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mai Chibwe ini ndine shamwari akaitirwa izvozvi. Anoti iye agarira kuti vana vapinzwe chikoro. Zvinomurwadza kuvhura makumbo asi ari kungoita kudaro pfungwa dziri kuvana nelifeatyle yakasetwa nababa wevana ava.

Mai E Chibwe said...

Muno mu UK inyaya inonetsa chose pavanhu vanopa COUNSELLING nokuti vazhinji vavo vanofunga kuti vana vanokura pamhuri ine vabereki vasingadanani vana vanokanganisika musoro. Vanoti zviri nani kukura nomubereki umwe chete ane rudo pane kuita vaviri vasingadani.

Inyaya inotaugwa chose asi vakadzi vakawanda mazuvano vava kungozvara vana vavasingazivi kuti madzibaba avo ndeapi iri nari yokuhura nevarume vakawanda. 25% yevana vanozvagwa muUK havazivi madzibaba avo.

Anonymous said...

Kuhura kwemurume is socially accepted in most societies, including our own. Whether u and I believe that it is right or wrong is a matter of our own view of the world. That doesn't make it social convention. As it stands now, Zim law allows barika, and many churches allow it too.

One can argue that western culture has imposed this 'one man-one woman' standard on Africans....just as democracy is imposed on African societies. No wonder we are failing on both accounts, even though we are more educated.

Mai E Chibwe said...

Agreed as stated by numbers. However, it is also true that this acceptance is more prevalent in the less educated women, who themselves are less likely to do certain things such as:
1 Cheat on their husbands
2 Have an ability to survive independent of their husbands
3 Be accepted back in their families if divorced
4 Think there may be a viable alternative life style outside marriage

Women who are more financially independent are a little less likely to ACCEPT a competitor in the home.

The whites are as likely to have several wives as the blacks. They just do it by a system called serial monogamy unless they live in parts of US where certain sects live.

Mai E Chibwe said...

But still tine shoko rokuti KUHURA rinoreva murume kana mukadzi anohura.

Anonymous said...

There are contradictions in your argument:

First you say: Varume vanhu vanokwanisa kungoda umwe munhu wekuvata naye asi rudo pasina.

Then mopedzisira moti: Panyaya dzese idzi tinoona kuti murume wako rudo newe haana.
How do u reconcile these two statements?

I would argue (from a man's point of view) that kuhura kwangu is not a sign that handina rudo nemudzimai wangu. Kwete. Handitodi kuti mudzimai azvizive. It is becoz I love my wife wholeheartedly.
Rather, kuhura kwangu inongova tsika yakaipa, asi ichigamuchirwa mumagariro edu. We are socialized to accept it as normal, saka vanakomana vedu chero vakaita magirlfriends akawanda, tinotofara kana kuseka zvedu sekuti chinhu chisina maturo.

Imimi argument yenyu is interpreting a simple ( and possibly wrong) social phenomenon, then label it as something that reflects a husband's lack of love for his wife. No. That is the western interpretation. Imimi semunhu anotaridza kunzwisisa tsika dzedu, can u interpret it in our experience sevanhu vechitema?

Mai E Chibwe said...

Vanhu veChitema, zvikuru vemuZimbabwe, havachina zvakawanda zvatinoti ndezvedu zvisina kuwedzegwa INFLUENCE nenguva yatakanga tiri nhapwa dzevanhu vasiri vedu. Uyezve isu pachedu magarire edu tinofarira kuhi WESTERNERS . Zvekuroorana tava nenguva tichiti pakuroorana topikirana kuti tozosiyana parufu, tese murume nomukadzi topika kuti hapana umwe wandichada kuzhe kwako iwe. Vanopururudza vopururudza.
Tinoonazve kuti michato yedu maitire ayo akarerekera kune zviitwa zvisina kubva munyika yedu. Ipapa zvaiva zvedu zvasara panyaya zvanoita zvishoma gore rimwe nerimwe. Kune zvokubvisa fuma zvaiitigwa kubatanidza mhuri mbiri zvakachinja zvava kuitigwa kufumisa vabereki. Nyaya dzakaita sekusungira mimba mazuvano maitire acho ava okungoita zvomutemo asi kumusha kunozvara vakawanda havachaendi. Nyaya dzakawanda dzatisinei nadzo dzaitevegwa kare.
Pakuroorana tinovimbisana umwe noumwe achifunga kuti umwe wake anotaura nomoyo wese. Ndiko tichizoti umwe vakahura totaura shoko iroro rokuti kura, rinova shoko rinozikamwa kuti rine zvakaipa pariri. Kuti titaure kuti varume kuvimbisa kwavo pamuchato ndekwenhema chinhu chingaita kuti nyaya yedu ichinje kuonekwa kwayo. Nokuti mukadziwo anokwanisa kuti aingotaurawo achiziva kuti achazoita zvikomba. Mazuvano kune vanhukadzi vakawanda vanobvunza kuti “Ndohurirawo murume here sezvaandiitigwa nomurume?” Kare mubvunzo uyo handifungi kuti wange uriko.
Zvakadaro tinoona kuti mukadzi ahurigwa haafungi kuti murume anomuda asi angoitawo zvemusikahwa. Fungwa yake inoti murume haachina rudo neni nokuti dai achindida dai asina kunohura noumwe ini ndiripo ndisina kumurambira. Zvokuzoti kuhura kune vanofunga kuti kunobvumwa murudzi gwedu hazvisviki panyaya. Ndezvevekuma University vanenge vachingoitirana havo nyaya vasina experience yokuhurigwa. Pamaonere emukadzi/murume ahurigwa umwe wake haachina rudo naye.
Kuhura pachivande hatingati zvinoreva kuti uchiri kuda umwe wako. Kutizisa umwe mukadzi , kuitiswa mimba nechikomba, handifungi kuti kune vakawanda vangaona sokuti kuita izvi pachivande kunoratidza kuti uchiri kuda umwe wako.

Anonymous said...

Ini handisikuda l dn't want to comment but l'm having a problem yekuti ndrikunze kwenyika and my wife in Zim...and ndakanzwa kuti mudzimai wangu akarara nemunhu wandinoziva and he used to be my friend that person when l asked my wife she told me it was a lie l love yu for yu to trust me come back and we must go to the prophets and find out chokwadi maybe vanhu mungangondibatsirawo what should l do l love her but if it is true l'm realy confused about this so pliz help vanokwanisa

Mai E Chibwe said...

Paupenyu hwedu pane mitemo yakawanda inotonga magarire edu. Umwe wemitemo iyi unoti roora/roogwa ugare nomunhu wako. Maroorana kudai fungwa inogara yakananga pamagarire emurume nomukadzi uye kuti vanogara sei. Hino pakaita nyaya yokuti hamukwanisi kugara mese, mutemo wemuviri unopatsana nmutemo wefungwa. Fungwa inoti kana une wawakaroorana naye chirega kutarisa vamwe, muviri unoti ndinoda kupedzwa zemo nguva nenguva. Nyaya yedu payatangira apo kupokana kwefungwa mbiri idzi uye kusahwisisa kuti wako pamhomho yese yevanhu ndeupi uye unofanira kuitei naye.


Kugara makati uyu kunyika yake uyu kwake hazvienderani nemagarire anoda muviri. Asi fungwa inokwanisa kuzvibvumira nokuda kwezvinodiwa kuvakwa pamusha. Mukadzi wemunhu akavirigwa nezuva ari kure, akafonera murume kuti awana pamwe pokuvata saka ozouya mangwana, anoshungurudza murume usiku hwese.

Iwe uri kure nomukadzi wako saka mese munogarofunganya panyaya yezvido zvomuviri nokuti munohwisisa kuti muviri unonetsa kusunga. Izvi zvinoitisa kuti ukangoudzwa nyaya inorerekera mukuhura kwemukadzi wotadza kuvata . Iyewo anoshaya hope achifunganya. Akahwa nyaya zvinomunetsa.

Nyaya dzokuhura idzi dzinoda kuhwisisa kuti munhu akuudza akuudzirei. Kana uri kure, uchigarotumira mari, mari iya isingagovewi zvakanaka, hakushai munhu anofunga kukupatsanisa nevamwe vaunotumira mari kuti yake igowanda. Tanga wahwisisa ipapo.

Kana uchivimba nomunhu wako, terera zvaanotaura asi tererawo zvinotaugwa pamusoro pake uhwisise kuti nyaya yacho iri papi. Kana munhu akuudza ari munhu mukuru, terera uone kuti anohwisisa zvaari kutaura here. Tarisa magarire akaita vanhu kuti ane kupokana here.

Zvevaporofita izvo kungotambisawo nguva nokuti vakawanda vavo vanhu vanoreva nhema zvokuti hapana chaunodzidza pavari. Kuti uwane muporofita anokuudza chokwadi unenge wapedza nyika yese uye mari yakawanda.

Tora mukadzi wako muhwisisane kana muchiri kudanana mozama kugara mese. Iwe wodzidzisa mukadzi kuda hama dzako kuti pasaita dzimwe nyaya.



Mai E Chibwe said...

Imboverenga apa panyaya dzinopokanisa vanhu pamusha

http://maichibwe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/nyaya-dzinorambanisa-vanhu-pamusha.html

Anonymous said...

Amai sanganai nemubvunzo:

There are contradictions in your argument:
First you say: Varume vanhu vanokwanisa kungoda umwe munhu wekuvata naye asi rudo pasina.

Then mopedzisira moti: Panyaya dzese idzi tinoona kuti murume wako rudo newe haana.

How do u reconcile these two statements?

Anonymous said...

Ini ndanetsekana nepfungwa yokuti ndakaroora ndine22yrs mdzimai wangu aine 19 ndakamuwana atobviswa humhandara ini ndainge ndisati ndamboziva chinonzi mkadzi saka zvripo ndezvekuti ndinogara ndichingofunga pamusoro pokubviswa humhandara kwake uye munhu akamubvisa ndomuziva ndinongonzwa zvichinzi mukadzi haakanganwe munhu akamubvisa humhandara ichokwadi here zvirikundidya pfungwa zvisingaite handizivivi ndodii kuti zvindiperere apa ini wacho handina kudambuka tsinga inonzi inodambuka pamurume hazvina dambudziko here kana ndichirara nemukadzi wangu ndokwanisa kumugutsa here nekuti ini ndinonzwa ndichida kukurumidza kubuditsa hurume uye vanhu ava havazokwanisa kupota vachirara vese here

Mai E Chibwe said...

Saka apa muri kungoda kuti tifunge kuti murume anokwanisa kuhura asi achida mukadzi wake here? Hazviiti izvozvo. Iye mufungwa make angaona hake sokuti anoda mukadzi wake asi mukadzi wake akaziva kuti murume anohura haangambofungi kuti kuhura uku ndekwekungoda umwe munhu wekuvata naye. Anoona musha wake wava pazvinhu zvinoda kuputsa.

Dai taikwanisa kuunganidza vanamai vemba tovadzidzsa kuti kuhura kwevarume hakunei nerudo, ndekwekufungigwa nechombo chete saka musaita hanya nazvo, taidai tisina nyaya huru. Asi kungoti kana murume wako atanga kuhura zvechokwadi rudo hapachina. Haachafungi nezvoutano hwako nokuti achakubatisa chigwere ugofa. Haachafungi nezve mashandisigwe emari mumba nokuti imwe mari ichaenda kuhure riya. Haachafungi nezvokugutsa mukadzi wake nokuti simba roperera kuhure riya. Rudo chinhu chinoda kukuchidzigwa semoto, uye unorukuchidzira nezvose zvinodiwa newaunoda. Kungofamba uchifunga kuti une rudo handigo rudo. Rudo ifungwa zvese nemabasa.

Haupi zvigwere kumunhu waunoda. Unototsvaka kudzivirira zvigwere. Nyaya dzese tinodzihwa. Murume anotanga achipfeka kondhomu asi kukapera vhiki mbiri achivhurigwa nehure riya, anobva atongoita pasina zvokufunga zvigwere, obvapo chombo chazara urume hwababa nhingi nababa nhingi nababa nhingi, osvika kumba opa mukadzi wake zvese izvozvo. Handiko kuita kwemunhu anoda mukadzi wake.

Hauudzi munhu waunoda nhema. Unototsva kuvimbika.

Haubiri munhu waunoda uchinopa wausingadi. Unototorera wausinga uchinopa waunoda.

Haufariri kusagutsa mukadzi waunoda uchii nokuti wambodya kwehure.

Ndizvo tichiti murume haachina rudo nemukadzi wake kana atanga nezvekuhura. Ngatisaudzana nhema panyaya iyi. Uye ngatisatsvaka imwe Phylosophy inotigadzikanisa hana pakuhura. Chihure chinouraya, asi hauurayi munhu waunoda. Ndipo pane nyaya, kwete kuti tizame kuti murume anokuda asi uku achihura. Hazviiti.

Anonymous said...

Pliz vehama ndibatsireiwo nenyaya yangu iyo l'm realy confused nazvo kubviswa humhandara kwake asi ndinomuda

Anonymous said...

Amai, u havent addressed the contradiction that I pinpointed in your own article. I take it that dzimwe dzangovawo nharo, based on your own ideals rather than what we know: men are programmed to have extramarital affairs. All they need is an opportunity.,,,you even admit as much in your article, so it is a no-brainer. Its not right, but ndiyo reality. Kubva kumaPresident kusvika kuna Mr. Ugly..... ndiyo nyaya yacho. From Sakorzy to Mugabe to Hollande. Kuudza vanasikana kuti it means murume haachakuda is simply telling them to leave their families.... voenda kupi, vana vachachengetwa naani? Vachawanepi murume asingahuri?



Mai E Chibwe said...

Sorry I was not aware we were having an argument. I thought we were discussing an issue to gain a common understanding.

I will start by pointing out that I did address the issue of whether or not one can have affairs and still love his wife. Read my submission on that.

Wabvunza mibvunzo yakawanda inoratidza kuti murume ada kuhura anozviita nokuti aona sokuti mukadzi wake haana chaangaita pazviri nokuti haadi kusiya mhuri, hakuna angachengeta vana vake kana asipo, haazokwanisi kuwana murume asingahuri, uye pamwe haana kwekuenda. Zvese izvi hazvinei nokudiwa kana kusadiwa. NdezvePOWER chete pakati penyu kuti murume aratidze kuti ane POWER. Zvinova zvinotoratidza kuti murume haachadi mukadzi. Rudo hagusi gweganyabvu mumba kuda kuratidzana kuti ane POWER ndiani pakati penyu.

Zvese zvawabvunza zvinotoratidza kuti murme haachadi mukadzi. Kuti EXAMPLE dzeupenyu dzinobva kuvanhu vakaita saana Sakorzy to Mugabe to Hollande, kutadza kuhwisisa nyaya pairi. Chii chingadzidzwa kuvanhu ava chingawedzera kukosha kweupenyu? Kana uri munhu anotevedzera zviitwa zvevanhu vanozikamwa, uchakanganisa upenyu hwako nehwevana vako zvese.

Ini pachangu handikurudziri munhu kuroora/kuroogwa asati agadzirisa upenyu hwake kusvika pakuona kuti murume/mukadzi akafa anoita sei nemhuri.

Ndiwo mafungire angu awa. Kana une mafungire akasiyana taurawo tihwisise. Discussion, not argument. Matter is too important to be arguing about.

Anonymous said...

Chokwadi matter is too important to be arguing about. Inoda kugadziriswa. Ini ndinongofunga kuti varume vanohurira vakadzi vanenge vasvika panguva yekufunga nechombo. Kune vanobva vatorasa nerudo kumukadzi voendera zvachose koita vanorangararira kuti zvavaita zvakaipa vodzokera kumukadzi. Saka ava vanodzokera ndinofunga kuti rudo vanenge vachinaro asi zvangoitikawo. Hameno mafungiro anguwo.

Anonymous said...

Zvinonzizve kuhura kwemurume pane imwe nguva kunoitiswa nokuziva kwake kuti haasi kugutsa mukadzi mumba. Vakaita RESEARCH yacho vanoti kuziva kuti mukadzi haaguti zvinoita murume aruze CONFIDENCE obva ada kumbozama noumwe mukadzi otoenda pachihure. Vakadziwo vakawanda vanoda varume vane dzimba nokuti vanoonekwa sevanhu vakatsiga. Zviviri izvi vinoita kuti chihure chisanetsa kuita.

Mukadzi wemumba kuhura kazhinji pane EMOTIONAL Issue iri kumunetsa.

Saka isu tinofanirawo kupa varume vedu CONFIDENCE panyaya yokuvatana. Kana une murume wako mukurudzire kuvata newe, ukuwo womuudza kuti zvinonaka uye kuti anogona basa. womubatsirawo kuita kuti azive kuti unoda kuvata naye, zvomupa manyawi. Kungoti ziii zvinoita zokuti hapana chaaita.

Anonymous said...

Yaah pano panodzidzwa zvakawanda my story goes like this ndinemkadzi kuZim...ini ndrikunze kweZimbabwe problem iripakuti ndrikungonzwa kuti my wife she sleep with another man,mrume uyu anova young brother yefriend yangu so handizivi chokwadi ndechipi coz iye arikuramba ondipikira pamberi pamwari now l'm feeling like kumusiya but l love her as much handizivi ndodii ndoramba here ndisina kubata ndega hangu mwana wangu ndiye arikuzondinzwisa tsitsi hake ndodii nemrume uyu nemkadzi wangu ndonzwa kutomboda kunorwa naye mrume uyu mkadzi ndomurova chaizvo oenda hake

Mai E Chibwe said...

Nyaya yokutanga ndeyokuti munhu wese zvake, murume/mukadzi anoda kuvata noumwe munhu. Kuroorana kuitira kuti ugovata naye pawadira. Hino upenyu hwedu hwekuti uyu ogaro oku uyu ogara uko hazvisizvo. Upa umwe wako tarisiro yokuti muchadzokera pakugara mese riini, kwete kungosiyana mogara makapatsana pasina PLAN handizvo.

Chechipiri nyaya yokuhura kwemukadzi haisi nyaya yokumirira kuudzwa noumwe munhu chero ari hama chero ari shamwari. Vanhu vane AGENDA dzavo dzakawandisa, zvikuru kana pane mari dzinobva mhiri. Chihure chinoda wazvibatira wega muridzi. Kana uchida enda kuZimbabwe wombonogara pamwe uchiongorora musha.

Kana vatauri vachiziva kuti zveshuwa zviri kuitika, ngavatore mapikicha vakutumire akawanda uzvionere wega, kwete SMS.

Anonymous said...

Ko kana mkadzi achinge arara nomumwe mrume ini mrume wake handina kuzvibata asi ndaudzwa kuti mkadzi wangu ndizvo zvaakaita izvi ende chinenge chirichokwadi asi iye anenge achiramba vese nemrume wakarara naye ndokwanisa kumuramba here anenge achindida mkadzi uyu here kana kuti kutotamba nenguva yangu pedzisire ndakuchengeta vana vasiri vangu like now ndinemwana 1 ndatoconfused kuti mwana ndewangu here asi vanhu vanenge vachingoti akafanana newe zvekuti kuti tiite DNA test l know kuti inodhura.ndoramba mkadzi uyu here nokuti ndakuona kunge vanhu vanozondiita munhu akadyiswa nemkadzi ndanetseka ini

Mai E Chibwe said...

Mataurire awaita zvinoita sokuti iwe muridzi wemukadzi unotobvuma kuti mukadzi akakuhurira asi usina PROOF yazvo. Kuudzwa noumwe munhu haisi PROOF asi kuzvionera kana kuti kuwana zvimwe zvinhu zvakaita sezvinyogwa zvepafoni/Email zvinozvitaurira zvega kuti chii chakaitwa. Asi kuudzwa nevakawanda vakazviona chinhu chinokwanisawo kukupa chokwadi. Zivazve kuti hakuna munhu anohura agobvuma kuti ahura nokuti kuhura kunoitwa pachivande saka munhu anomirira kusvika anyatsobatwa ozobvuma.


Asizve kumirira kuti uwane PROOF unotomirira wakachenjera nokuti unokwanisa kubata zvigwere panguva iyoyo.

Chokutanga, zvibvunze kuti chahurisa mukadzi chii? Chechipiri moita sei nazvo. Kuhura kwemukadzi hakuna kusiyana nekwemurume asi kungoti zvikonzero zvacho. Vakadzi vanohura kana murume asina rudo mumba. Varume vanohura kazhinji kana murume akaziva kuti ari kutadza kugutsa mukadzi mumba.

Kana ukasiya mukadzi pamusha ukanoshanda kure mese munokwanisa kuhurirana. Mese mune mhosva yokusagara pamwe chete

Zvokuti mwana ndewani hazvinei izvo. Zvinokwanisika kuti mwana ndewako asi mukadzi achingohura zvakadaro. Hazvirevi chinhu pakuhura. Makondhomu ariko ekuhurisa pasina mimba. Pamwezve zvinoita kuti chikomba chinobudisa chodiridzira pazhe muridzi wemukadzi achinyatsodiridzira mukati memukadzi. Asi chero vachishandisa kondomu kana chii, chinongori chihure chete.

Chikuru ndechokuti chihure chisaenderera mberi pakati penyu uye kana akahurawo zveshuwa musiyane nokuti rudo rushoma. Hakuna munhu anohura ane rudo noumwe wake.

Gadzirisai nyaya yenyu ipere mese muzive pamuri nayo. Kana chihure chiripo mosiyana.

Kana maregererana mugadzira STRATEGY yokupedza chihure. Mowedzera rudo, mowedzera kuvata mese zvinogutsa mese. Kana nyaya yapera ngairege kuti mukatukana yomutswa.

Moudza hama dzenyu mafambire aita nyaya kuti zvikazoshata mberi vawane kukusapotai mese.

Zvokudyiswa izvo kungotaurawo kwevanhu. Hakuna mushonga unoitisa rudo. RELATIONSHIP yako hainei nemitauro yevanhu. Zvigadzirirei pachenyu kuti modei mese.

Anonymous said...

Ndinenyaya inondinetsa zvakanyanya hangu ndakawana mkadzi wangu isiri mhandara asi ndaidawo kuroora mhandara sezvo ini ndainge ndisati ndamboziva kurara nemkadzi.ndinonzwa kuti mkadzi haakanganwi nyakubvisa humhandara ichokwadi here ndoda kuziva hangu pliz nyakubvisa humhandara mkadzi wangu ndinogara naye kumusha kumwechete asi mkadzi ayimbondirambira ndakazoita zvekuvhura acc yefacebook inerimwe zita ndokuzozvibata kuti ndiye akamubvisa ndakazomubvunza akabvuma hake inyaya inondirwadza hangu ndibatsireiwo havakwanisi kuzozvita futi here anomukanganwa hre nyakumubvisa humhandara ndipo panemubvunzo wangu chete kunyanya???

Mai E Chibwe said...

Varume vakawanda vanoda kuroora mhandara uye vanozvidya moyo upenyu hwavo hwese nenyaya yokuziva kuti pane imwe murume akatombopinza chombo chake mumukadzi wake wemumba uyu. Isuwo tinonetseka kuziva kuti murume akambovata noumwe mukadzi.

Mushonga wacho kuti kana uri mhandara roogwa nejaya Jayavo roora mhandara. Hazvinetsi kubvunza munhu kuti uri jaya here kana mhandara.

Vakawanda vanotaura kuti akakubvisa humhandara ukasangana naye munokwanisa kuvata mese futi asi chokwadi ndechokuti munhu wawakambovata naye mukazoparadzana pasina kupokana ukasangana naye pasina chinokukonesai munovatanazve.

secre said...

Mai chibwe ini l think kuti mukadzi anenge akangobva kare achiri musikana kuhura thats why saka haazomboregi nekuti wamuroora saka pakuroora apa varume chimbotorai nguva uchiongorora munhu