Friday 5 April 2013

Kuudza umwe wako kuti wabata siki kuzhe

Kana wabata siki kuhure kana chikomba, chii chaunofanira kuita? Siki dzinobatika dzakawanda. Ndakambonyora nezvadzo asi pano ndoda kutarisa nyaya yokuudzana kuti inoita here kana kuti haiiti. Kune vakawanda vanobata siki idzi vachiuya nadzi mumba. Dzimwe dzinouraya, dzimwe dzinorapika. Chii chatinofanira kuita nenyaya iyi. Apa ndiri kutarisa iye munhu wacho ane siki yaabata kuzhe kuti pane zvaangaita here kuti musha wake usafa nokuda kwesiki iyi. Zvikuru kana akaroorana nomunhu anofarira zvinhu zvake nguva yese?

Tinnoona kuti kune vanhu vakawanda vanoti murume ofa vhiki ino, mukadzi osarawo achitevera mwedzi usina kupera, iri nyaya yokuti pakubata zvigwere hatisi kuudzana mudzimba umu. Pakadai vana vanosara dzava nherera vabereki vese vaenda. Riyawo hure kana chikomba kwakabatwa siki pamwe rakatofawo kare. Kana dai risina kufa, haumbooni richizouya kuzorera vana vako. Mubvunzo wandinawo ndewekuti munhu anoita zvivindhi zvokuvata nehure/chikomba angashaya chivindhi chokuudza umwe wake kuti abata siki here?  Mubvunzi uyu unokwanisa kudavigwa neavo vakambozviwana vari panyaya yakadai.

Ukabvunza munhu kana ogwara vanhu vese vava kuziva kuti upenyu hapachina, unohwa nyaya dzakawanda. Ndakambobvunza imwewo hama yandakawana yapera muviri pandakaenda kumusha kuti'

"Nhai babamunini, shuwa mange marambigwa namaininini here kuzosvika pakuda zvemahure?" zvikahi,

 "Maiguru mubvunzu wenyu wataridza kuti hamuhwisisi nyaya iyi, nokuti kana wazvipira kuhura, hauna nguva yokufunga nezvekuti siki inobatwa. Ukatokwanisa kuzvifunga, unosimuka woenda kumba kwako usina kuvata nehure racho. Kana wako asipo, zvinonetsa kuti wawasangana naye akanyemwerera iwe woramba. Unohwa sokuti hausi murume."

Saka varume vese vanongovata here nomunhu wavasangana naye nokuti anyemwerera kana kuti pane imwe CHEMISTRY inonetsa varume vedu kungosiya pasina zvaaita. Ko kana afunga kuita, ko kushandisawo kondomu zvinodiiko? Iyi yese mibvunzo yedu tichitarisa tiri kuzhe kwenyaya. Vaya vaviri vari kuzviita vanozobvunza mibvunzo yese iyi vapedza kuvatana, hana yorova kuti pamwe nda bata chigwere.

Ndinoona nemwadhi dzandinowana kubva kuvanhu vakawanda varume nevakadzi, kuti izvo nyaya yokuti moda kuvatana, musingazivani, kuti umwe wenyu ataure kuti NGATISHANDISE KONDOMU, zvinoremera vakawanda izvozvo. Kunyengana nokubvisana mabhurugwa hazvinetsi, asi kuzotaura nezvekondomu zvinonetsa. Kuti sei zvichinetsa ndeimwewo nyaya iyi.

RESULT yacho ndeyokuti mapedza munhu anoenda kumba atova nesiki, iyi kana iyo. Adaro anonovata nowake siki iya isina kurapwa kuna kutombozikamwa kuti anayo. Pamutemo wemazuvano, wekuzhe kana wamuda, chishandisa kondomu. Kana zvatadza, chirega kunovata nowemumba usati wahwisisa kuti une siki here kana kwete.

Toti wavata nehure/chikomba asi wekumba ariko. Wosvika kumba wemumba achidawo zvinhu zvake, unofanira kuita sei kuti azive kuti hauzivi kuti une chigwere here kana kwete? Ukamuudza kuti wambovata noumwewo munhu, watotanga mago zvawo ange akazvivatira. Ukanyarara, unokwanisa kumupa siki.  Saka wodii?

Kana wako asiko, unokwanisa kuwana nguva yokunovhenekwa kuti une chigwere here kana kwete, wozosangana newako wava kuziva, uye wawana nguva yokufunga zvokuita nenyaya yako. Kana uchitya kutaura asizve usingadi kupawako chigwere, unokwanisa kukumbira shamwari yako kukuperekedza kumba, monoitirana hasha pane anokwanisa kukununura.

Ngatitange neyaya yokunhu anohura asi mukadzi/murume wake aripo pamba uye asingamurambiri, zvinoreva kuti haana mukana wekuramba kwenguva inotendera kunoonekwa nevarapi. Saka chasara ndechokuti audze umwe wake kana kunyarara wovata naye akadaro.

Munhu kana afunga zvokuhura, pakuhura kwake haafungi nezvevana uye haana pikicha mumusoro wake yokuona upenyu hwevana, kukura kwavo, kupinda chikoro, kuendawo ku University, kuzotsvaka mabasa, vabereki vari vapenyu vachipawo mazano. Haana fungwa yokuda kuona vazukuru vake. Ane fungwa imwe chete yokuda kurhojana nouyu wekuzhe chete. Chero shamwari dzake dzikada kumutsiura, anotoona sokuti ndivo vasingawhisisi zvinhu zvakanaka paupenyu. Zvokufunga zvakanaka zvinozouya mumusoro munhu atohura, ndipo pamunoona munu otanga kuchema misodzi kwahi seiko musina kunditsiura, ndimi makarega ndichibata chigwere hino nhasi ndofa. Kana umwe wake ava nechigwerewo munoona kuti pamusha pashaika mufaro.

Saka mubvunzo uripo ndewekuti unoudza umwe wako sei kuti "Ngatimbomira kuvatana nokuti ndahura nhasi." Kana uri murume/mukadzi mumba imbofunga kuti unodii kana mukadzi/murume wako akauya kumba akakuudza kuti ahura uye haana shuwa kuti ane siki here kana kuti haana saka dai mambomira kuvatana kusvika adzoka kuTEST. Unokwanisa kuurawa musi wakadai. Kana une shamwari dzokubasa, kuCHURCH, kubhora, kuCLUB, dzese dzinonoudza wofumugwa woonekwa sokuti hauhwisisi asi ipapo ndiwe watoita musoro wekudzivirira umwe wako kubata chigwere.

Ini sokuona kwangu pane nyaya mbiri apa, yokutanga ndeyemaonero emunhu ahura. Ahura hake asi azofunga mhuri yake saka kukuudza kwaari kuita kuda kuti uhwisise kuti hazvichaiti kuti tivate tese saka ngatimbomira titaure kana uchida kutaura. Kana usingadi kutaura chingobvuma tisavata tese.

Munhu anohura haanetseki pakureva nhema. Anozosvika pamba atova neSTORY yake zvokuti anokwanisa kutaurira umwe nhema dzinobvumuka. Zvodaro kusvika pakuti iwe wobvuma nhasi, Mangwana wobvuma, Asi kuti uzoramba wongobvuma hazvizoiti. Toti ipapo nyakuhura aenda kunovhenekwa owanikwa ane chigwere, paanozouya kumba anofanira kuchibuda pachena. Kana asingadi kupa umwe wake chigwere zveshuwa anofanira kutaura chokwadi.

Kutaura chokwadi kana wava pakadai zviri nani kungotaura sezvazviri. Wana nguva yokutaura vana vasipo Kutanga nyaya yakadai pane vana zvinokwanisa kukanganisa SECURITY yevana. Zviri nani kutanga nyaya vana vaenda kunovata kumba kweshamwari kana kwambuya. Zvadaro wana mukana wekutanga nyaya yako kumunhu asina kana fungwa yokuti pane chaitika. Gara une fungwa yokuti achaita SHOCK. Ndipo pandati kana zvichikunetsa kutaura wega, wana shamwari yokuvapo paunotanga nyaya, kana kutoudza shamwari kuti itange nyaya iwe ugozorondedzera.  Kana yangotanga hazvizonyanyi kunetsa kuitaura. Ndakabatsira vatatu kutaura nyaya dzavo After ndambotaura navo kwenguva kuti zviri nani vaudze umwe wavo. Ndipo pandakahwisisa kuti inyaya inonetsa kutaurira munhu waunoziva kuti anokuda asi anofanira kuziva zvandaita. Kana yatotaugwa ikabuda mumuromo, haichakwanisi kumiswa saka watopedza panonetsa.

Nyaya yechipiri ndeya Nyakuudzwa. Zvakaoma kuhwa munhu waunoda achikuudza kuti ahura uye ane siki. Unoona munhu achiterera nyaya yakadai achiita seimba yadhirika, dziri shungu uye kusahwisisa kuti zvaitika sei. Munhurume kazhinji anotanga kuterera omboita nguva zvisina kunyatsopinda mumusoro, ozoita hasha zvokukwanisa kukuvadzi mukadzi. Kana uri mukadzi wemunhu, ona kuti pane umwe munhu paunoudza murume wako. Kana uri murume mukadzi wako akaita hasha, unokwanisa kumubata zvichibva nokuti munhu akaita sei. Kana waudzwa ukahwa muviri wako uchiita Depression kuita sewafigwa, hapana chakaipa. Inyaya inogumbura saka gumbuka hako asi terera kuti umwe wako anoti kudii nokuti kana usina kuterera uchashaya INFORMATION yokukubatsira kufunga zvokuita. Nyakuudzwa anokwanisa kuita makore ari munhu asina mufaro, zvichibva nokuti wabata nyaya yako sei. Zvikuru kana uchida umwe wako.

Kana waudzwa, chokutanga hwisisa kuti umwe wako akanganisa upenyu hwenyu mese asi apa ari kuda kuti kukanganisa kwake kusawedzera. Dai anyarara aikupa siki. Kukutaurira kwaaita kutsvaka mukana wekuchengeta muhuri yenyu. Ita hako hasha nokupopota asi iye atozvipopotera kare saka anohwisisa zvese zvauri kutaura.

Wana nguva yokuongorora zvaitika muupenyu hwako. Wana nguva yokubvunza umwe wako maitikire azvo. Kana hure/chikomba ari munhu anokwanisika kutaura naye, enda unotaura naye uhwisise kuti anofungei noumwe wako.  Varume kazhinji vanongovata nomukadzi wemunhu kuti vagobhosita kuti akakwira mukadzi wemunhu asi pasina RELATIONSHIP.  Vakadzi pakuita chikomba kazhinji kutsaga rudo, kuri kushaya rudo mumba. Kakuziva kuti wahurigwa, zvibvunzewo kana iwe uri munhu asina kubata umwe wako zvakakodzera. Tisiri kuti kuhura kwese kune rhizeni inobva mumba asi kuti iwe nyakuudzwa zvibvunze mibvunzo yese kuti ukwanise kuregerera kana kusaregerera.


Kana waregerera, chigara naye pasi muronge program yokutangazve patsva upenyu hwenyu. Ukaona murume/mukadzi anokuudza kuti aita siki kuzhe saka haadi kuvata newe kusvika yapera, munhu anoziva RESPONSIBILITY yake kwauri. Vashoma vanhu vakadai saka ipa RESPONSE yako wambowana nguva yokufunga zvakakwana.
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Mazuvano chihure hachichanetsi nokuti varume nevakadzi vese vari kuchitsvaka, iri ngari yokuti vanhu vakaroorana vanokwanisa kugara kwakasiyana asi vese vachida kuvatana nomunhu. Nyaya yefoni dzomuhombodo iyi yakawedzera chihure nokuti ikozvino unokwanisa kunyenga mukadzi/murume neTEXT zvinova zvisingasvodesi. Wadaro motoronga yokusangana mese muchitoziva kuti muri kusanganira chihure.

Varume nevakadzizve vanoshanda vese pamakambani akawanda vanoswera vese vachiita nyaya saka kuhura hakuvanetsi. Vanhu vakawandisa vanorhojerana kumabasa avo vozoenda kumba kumukadzi/murume vatogutira kubasa. Siki hadzinetsi kubata, zvikuru kune mapenzi asingadi makondomu.


Taurai tihwe vane mashoko.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ko if I had contracted the STD from a toilet seat or from an injection, i.e. in circumstances where I am not to blame... would the same question arise? How would I break it out to my wife?

Arima twake ndihombarume.... I would just inform her, hard as it is. Chances are she will be angry etc, but when the dust settles, she will be most grateful for my honesty and courage